Ray Sawhill

You won't find me in this crowd

Because I’ve become fascinated by the Paleo/Primal/Evolutionary eating and fitness worlds, a few months ago I started doing some weightlifting.

Don’t be impressed, I’m talking baby stuff: beginning exercises with very modest weights. I’m very careful and cautious in my approach, because the few times in the past that I’ve tried pushing weights around I always managed to hurt myself well before I developed any kind of strength. And what’s the point of pain?

This time, though, I’m semi-enjoying weightlifting. In one sense I find it what I always found it to be: dumb, literal, and a little depressing. As an activity that’s immediately fun and rewarding, weightlifting (for me, of course) can’t compare to yoga or Gyrotonic, both of which have poetic and philosophical components and both of which leave me feeling tingly and cheerful.

Pushing weights around, by comparison, tiring one muscle group out and then the next ... It’s so damn methodical and unimaginative. After I’m done with my weights routine I feel plodding and a little stupid, and my spirit feels a little crushed.

All that said ... Now that I’ve persisted for a few months I’m starting to enjoy some payoffs too. Although I’m a long way from developing any real strength -- I suspect that I’m biochemically unable to achieve much of anything beyond modest toning -- let alone making any visible improvements in my looks, I notice that I’m standing a little straighter and taller, and that I occupy space a little more confidently and assertively than I’m usually prone to. Though my spirit isn’t soaring the way it does when I do yoga regularly, I’m nonetheless taking my time and finding myself able to drop into the moment semi at will.

And how lovely it is to manage a few everyday strength challenges more capably than I have in years. F’rinstance: I lug groceries around a little more easily. And I’ve experienced a huge improvement in my ability to get up and down -- onto and off of stairs, beds, and floors.

Kids: You have no idea what a challenge getting up and down starts to become in middle age.

Benefits -- I like ‘em. Maybe there’s something to be said for dumb, methodical and literal after all.